My incompetent way of living :( :( :(

This write up looks funny or say nonsensical, but there are many serious thoughts hidden. Although thoughts are serious, we end up making 'fun of seriousness'. I will take a color print of this page, stick it to all the walls of my apartment including toilet. I will try to get inspired (rather feel humiliated) and will try to accomplish atleast 1 out of 1000 things I plan.

Yesterday I and Shiva went gym after long time. We took 2 long weeks to pull our ass to the doorsteps of gym. Neither of us had courage to step into the gym alone, as we were not ready to face surprise gestures and sarcastic smiles. This is our 6th season in span of 10 months, hehehe. Today Shiva came up with some new rule. If either of us bunk the gym we should pay 10 dhs (135 Rs) to the other. But his voice was shivering when he told the plan and I was afraid of loosing money quite often :D

Last time when we went gym - one Arabic guy greeted us 'oh you are back... Great'. The word 'Great' was really chagrining. Another Filipino guy grinned dimly which conveyed 'oh guys, I never seen you like jerks in my life'. Once a elderly man introduced me to his frend 'Hey this is Guru from Bangalore, He comes to the same gym where I go...'. With a small pause he continued '....but very rarely' and he laughed as if he never had fun since he is born..... Saala budda :(

Every evening before we leave office, either of us will go to other's work desk. We approach in lower tone 'so, do you want to goto gym today?'. The approacher's eyes will be filled with desire, curiosity and will be just craving to listen 'no' from the other.

I never accomplished anything in my life. I never think about appraisal because I am neither money-minded nor performance-oriented. I never eat Roti, Naan or Kulcha because it is difficult to chew. I don't work continuously for 1 hr anytime because I feel I am taking life too serious :( :( :( I can't think too much because my brains will start weighing heavy and I can't bare it. In the below link, read the comments in red box wrote by 'Landi' in the upper middle of the page :)
http://social.answers.microsoft.com/Forums/en-US/vistahardware/thread/720108ee-0a9c-4090-b62d-bbd5cb1a7605

Sometimes I feel like committing suicide by hanging to a fan. But I may loose interest before I tie the rope. So if I really want to kill myself, then any of my friend should tie the rope and keep the chair beneath. Later I may stand on the chair and would say 'please hang the rope to my neck and tighten it up dude. I will be grateful to you'. Before he slaps me, I will add 'Dood, please push the chair aside once you tighten it. Or else I won't die' !!!

Anyways, maximize the image and choose a word you are best suited with. It has both -ve and +ve words which revolves around 'stupid'. Initially I thought I am 'jerk', but seeing my incompetent way of living, now I stand myself with the word 'crack brained'. And I vote Shiva with the word 'dopey' because he is slightly better than me and hence less intensified word than 'crack brained'.

Whatever I am, this game of tracking +ve and -ve counts stimulates me whenever I feel satisfied/ unsatisfied with my way of doing things.