Sunday, May 17, 2009

With Love

Thanx to my chap - Manjesh who doled out idea of conveying meaningful message in one sentence. Concentrate on the tense of verbs, it will definitely convey the meaning intended.

She was neither most beautiful nor exceptionally best instead she knew how to express love and how to stand beside me every mo, though I was the reason for all fights we had due to my inability of expressing love she always compromised by heart, anyhow whatever my external gestures could be, our inner selves knew the fondness we had as we were madly in love with each other, she was the essence of my love who made me feel my existence and showed me how good I can be for someone and in short, life wouldn't be so beautiful without her because all she knew was to dream about 'us' and not about 'her' alone, however, destiny was jealous on our affection and showed it's envy in the form of fatal accident in which my aroha ended her life and I couldn’t come out of the scarred face I saw in the hospital, I loved her not for what she was but for what I was when I was with her but now she left me mercilessly on this damn earth and I am crying aimlessly again and again because nothing else I can do and moreover I am not the person who get excited if space ship lands on mars instead I get excited if my hearty friend tells he/ she is happy, all I want is my love and handful of beloved friends with whom I express – experience - enjoy the affection and I am very specific in these due to which I decided to kill myself and now when I am swallowing the poison, I am hearing a cute voice singing in familiar low tone and I am surprised – confused – scared when I understood that it is my better half's voice, I couldn’t believe that she is still alive and now she is kissing my forehead, holy shit, it was 6 in the morning and the dream drove my nuts crazy, besides I re-realized the importance of her, I kissed her passionately, hugged and begged her not to leave me alone anytime, she was anxious as I was bestowing intensified love and took me on her lap and asked me to take a nap after which the non-stop ring from my friend woke me up, nonetheless, this time nobody was around, I realized that I don’t have any girl in my life yet and I tried to smile but I couldn’t, the weird dream-inside-dream haunted me and finally I was left with a question: we always forget ‘today’ in the attempt of catching ‘tomorrow’ but what if ‘tomorrow never comes’ in the way we wish?, we do not express our feelings with the loved ones just to show ourselves unaffected but there is a beautiful life beyond this unaffected way of living where we can express affection and experience the same ahhhh at last I grinned at myself when I saw me in the mirror with tooth brush in my mouth, ufffff few dreams should never turn true and this particular one should never – ever turn true.