Sunday, January 8, 2012

End of Journey

Bangalore & India, these names are driving me nuts. I never knew I am so weak. It was in 2008 when I was craving to get rid of India, may be in search of sophistication. I always felt life is incomplete in Bangalore. Struggle in traffic, struggle with relations, struggle for money, always STRUGGLE.

The desire to turn rich at young age made me love this new place. Money, acquaintances kept me occupied. Unfortunately, it was just a flash and not the light for life. Work and earnings gave peace of mind but loneliness overruled this in no time. Pissing on roadsides and crossing the roads without waiting for Green turned more valuable than sophistication. Is this an example for ‘grass on other side of greenery always appear green’ :P

Arguments with family, hang outs & misunderstandings with friends, fights with customer care executives etc were small things then. But never knew I am addicted to these.

Its neat & clean here. I stopped fighting because nothing is wrong here. I stopped panicking because nothing is there to worry here. I stopped missing somebody because nobody is mine and whomever I prefer to be mine are too far to miss! I can’t take this deadpan attitude anymore. Being unaffected is the worstest way of living!

A few people will know the value of their belongings before loosing them. But I realized the value of Bangalore only after I lost it. With 1000s of confusions behind, finally I am relocating to Bangalore and I never want to move out of Bangalore again :) I am not stating this with apprehension, but with repose. May be I won’t meet friends everyday, but still the surrounding is mine. May be I will struggle with lack of sophistication (let it be power cut or terrific traffic), but this is better than living dead.

Guyz, this is for the people who are cruising in the same ship as mine. Identify what you want and how you want. If you get ‘what you want’ in any other way than ‘how you want’, you will never enjoy what you got, no charm ah.

Not realizing the value of our land when we stay there is fair enough. Trying to find the charm outside India is also fair. Forgetting India if you can find the happiness outside is also not wrong. But missing your place desperately and still withholding your desires for extra bucks is not at all worth. For the people who are in this group, my small advice is ‘please stop fooling yourselves, its fake’.

For people who never wanted to stay outside India, you are the best, don’t even think about it. For people who are dying for opportunity but never got chance to explore, relax madi. May be India is not great, but rest of the countries also aren’t. All you will realize is, ‘I gained something but I lost something else’. And the biggest thing you loose is ‘yourness’.